Groups

    Opinions on this text, please?

    This is kind of nonsensical and I would like feedback if one may. The setting is of a vampire woman that was meant to be burnt by an executor, but then turned it around and, with a burst of almost-gone strength, she burnt him instead. Best criticism gets the cookie.

    And please don't correct my punctuation, just the non-poem "poem"

    O no pressed expire instead of edit

    12 Comments

    That was a poem?

    Original Poster

    maz888

    That was a poem?


    No it's a text, sorry to butcher "poem", just wanted to not be repetitive in that approach

    Oh well, thanks for your post regardless of its indepth opinion.
    Edited by: "consume" 28th Sep 2016

    consume

    No it's a text, sorry to butcher "poem", just wanted to not be repetitive … No it's a text, sorry to butcher "poem", just wanted to not be repetitive in that approachOh well, thanks for your post regardless of its indepth opinion.


    Was she she only a small vampire thats why she only bit his knee whereas most vampires as we all know go for the neck

    Original Poster

    archer1204

    Was she she only a small vampire thats why she only bit his knee whereas … Was she she only a small vampire thats why she only bit his knee whereas most vampires as we all know go for the neck


    There's the thing, I actually wanted to put a small explanation for why she didn't do that. Did not go down.
    Edited by: "consume" 31st Oct 2016

    consume

    There's the thing, I actually wanted to put a small explanation for why … There's the thing, I actually wanted to put a small explanation for why she didn't do that. Did not go down. So alternatively I can assure you she didn't do that because he wore an executioner's helmet, which also covered his neck (chainmail). Seeing that he was wearing a full tunic below with no protection at all, she lunged in that direction and tore the cap.


    i like chocolate chip

    Original Poster

    oO ok then. Ty for the insightful question

    consume

    oO ok then. Ty for the insightful question


    What was your inspiraton

    Original Poster

    archer1204

    What was your inspiraton


    In all honesty, a game I was playing that had a vampire class in it and - you guessed it - the executioner.

    consume

    In all honesty, a game I was playing that had a vampire class in it and - … In all honesty, a game I was playing that had a vampire class in it and - you guessed it - the executioner.


    I would never have guessed that by the way you can post it
    Edited by: "archer1204" 28th Sep 2016

    Original Poster

    archer1204

    I would never have guessed that by the way you can post it


    Why, it's called Town of Salem. Basic and fun game. Heard of it?

    consume

    Why, it's called Town of Salem. Basic and fun game. Heard of it?


    No sorry what flavour is the cookie

    Original Poster

    archer1204

    No sorry what flavour is the cookie


    Oh go on then, 'tis a classic 1 from Tesco Sainbury's or Asda etc - chocolate chip. Enjoy and good night.
    Post a comment
    Avatar
    @
      Text
      Top Discussions
      1. word association Game74044585
      2. Just heard this...2 ★★★★★★★★★★★★★★ congrats to all on 392k ★★★★★★★★★★★★★★7767526
      3. SNES Classic launches 29th September 2017 - Check for stock and pre-order i…4691434
      4. I want to talk about the WEATHER no politics no religion19047199

      See more discussions