Swine flu jokes/ any other decent ones

21 replies
Found 4th May 2009
im bored wondering if theres any decent swine flu jokes about (or any others)

i have:

a lion, a bear, and a pig sit at a table. the lion says, when i roar the whole jungle shakes. the bear says, when i roar, the whole forest shakes. the pig says, SO WHAT! when i sneeze, the whole world sh**s itself! (my fave)

think i got swine flu, im coming out in rashers

i started sneezing today and called the NHS swine flu helpline, but all i got was crackling.


any others?

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21 Comments

Swine flu can’t touch me… I put up a red stop swine in front of my house!!!

My mates got swine flu. I think hes just telling porkies though!

Someone once said when a black man becomes president pigs will fly. Sure enough 100 days later.. “swine flew”

Original Poster

onlyme23;5118721

Someone once said when a black man becomes president pigs will fly. Sure … Someone once said when a black man becomes president pigs will fly. Sure enough 100 days later.. “swine flew”



lol

The 7 dwarfs regretted failing to see the signs as Sneezy eventually died from swine flu.




So it appears Swine flu has replaced the fears about bird flu.
I guess bird flu just never took off...



You've got to hand it to the Mexicans.
..............Even Osama Bin Laden didn't scare this many Americans.




So, the first cases of confirmed Swine Flu in the UK have been recorded in Scotland.
No bad thing - at least Susan Boyle might start wearing a mask.

I hear there's been some cases of Swine Flu in Texas.
Surely that qualifies it as an STD now.

Mad Cow Disease: Named for my wife

Swine Flu: Named for her mother.

Original Poster

just the three of us in here lol, u hear the echoes?

Wife calls hubby
I've run out of petrol, im scared to fill up because of `swine flu`
hubby say daft sod it's in Mexico not Texico!!!!!

Just won a holiday to Mexico

Can't go, im pig sick

http://img13.imageshack.us/img13/2365/oinkment.jpg
http://img13.imageshack.us/img13/581/swineflu.gif

Think i've got swine flu,

I keep coming out in Rashers !!!!

Bored on your way to work?
Stuck on a crowned bus/train/tube?
Pretend to phone a friend talking loudly about getting back last night from a fantastic 4 week tour of Mexico
Then Sneeze

I have a friend on Facebook whose status says "Suicidal – Standing on the edge of a cliff".

So I poked him...

Thought I had swine flu, went to the doc and he gave me some oinkment.

Swine flu jokes/ any other decent ones



im bored wondering if theres any decent swine flu jokes about (or any … im bored wondering if theres any decent swine flu jokes about (or any others)



Just happened to be reading a joke site at the same time as reading this one

sancho1983;5119439

Just happened to be reading a joke site at the same time as reading this … Just happened to be reading a joke site at the same time as reading this one



Tenner says it was sickipedia:thumbsup:

harlzter;5119597

Tenner says it was sickipedia:thumbsup:



IOU £10 :thumbsup: :-D

Not many others i could get away with posting here

[http://i258.photobucket.com/albums/hh244/octobergirl28/pooandpiglet.jpg[/

[SIZE="5"][COLOR="Red"]THANKS TO SKUSEY - STILL LAUGHING OVER THIS ONE[/COLOR][/SIZE]:thumbsup:

sancho1983;5119612

IOU £10 :thumbsup: :-DNot many others i could get away with posting here … IOU £10 :thumbsup: :-DNot many others i could get away with posting here



Where do you think I got mine from :whistling:

everytime my dad hears some one sneeze he goes oink ........ he gets some wierd looks :lol:

1st person: omg have you heard about the swine flu
2nd person: yes ive had it for weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeks!
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