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    Top Tips and Handy Hints

    Banned
    We all see them in magazines, after Sassie's comment in the shampoo/conditioner thread, I thought I would start one up.

    Come on, pearls of wisdom anyone?????:-D

    47 Comments

    Original Poster Banned

    P.S. The naff ones are always the best.:thumbsup:

    If you can't afford a gravel driveway, stick rice krispies to your tyres - you get the authentic sound at a fraction of the cost!:giggle:

    Banned

    awwww it's always nice to see people get inspiration from my posts:giggle:

    Original Poster Banned

    cis_groupie

    If you can't afford a gravel driveway, stick rice krispies to your tyres … If you can't afford a gravel driveway, stick rice krispies to your tyres - you get the authentic sound at a fraction of the cost!:giggle:



    Thats the gist of it:giggle:

    Original Poster Banned

    sassie

    awwww it's always nice to see people get inspiration from my posts:giggle:



    Yes, every single one of them:-D

    Always poo at work. Not only will you save money on toilet paper, but you'll also be getting paid for it.

    Banned

    Prissymiss

    Yes, every single one of them:-D


    now, now:giggle:

    Banned

    bitseylango

    Always poo at work. Not only will you save money on toilet paper, but … Always poo at work. Not only will you save money on toilet paper, but you'll also be getting paid for it.


    :giggle: :giggle: :giggle: :giggle:

    OLD telephone directories make ideal personal address books. Simply cross out the names and address of people you don't know.

    Original Poster Banned

    bitseylango

    Always poo at work. Not only will you save money on toilet paper, but … Always poo at work. Not only will you save money on toilet paper, but you'll also be getting paid for it.



    Also, nick loo rolls, teabags etc. Oooh and paper for your home printer (all other stationary as well).

    Original Poster Banned

    Aggy

    OLD telephone directories make ideal personal address books. Simply cross … OLD telephone directories make ideal personal address books. Simply cross out the names and address of people you don't know.



    You could stack them up to make a bespoke occasional table:thumbsup:

    BUY ONE GET ONE FREE .......I find the best way to get two bottles of washing-up liquid for the price of one is by putting one in your shopping trolley and the other in your coat pocket.
    (joke :whistling: )

    If you suspect that there is a gas leak, an easy way to locate the leak is with the aid of a lit match.

    An empty aluminium cigar tube filled with angry wasps makes an inexpensive vibrator.
    :w00t: :w00t:

    Aggy

    If you suspect that there is a gas leak, an easy way to locate the leak … If you suspect that there is a gas leak, an easy way to locate the leak is with the aid of a lit match.



    My sister actually did that :? :roll:

    Fortunately there was no gas leak

    Someone's birthday? Don't spend £1 on a card, just buy a £1 gift voucher which comes with a free card, it will be a bonus for the person receiving it, or if you're a tight **** you could spend the voucher yourself. :thumbsup:

    WHEN reading a book, try tearing out the pages as you read them. This saves the expense of buying a bookmark

    Original Poster Banned

    bitseylango

    An empty aluminium cigar tube filled with angry wasps makes an … An empty aluminium cigar tube filled with angry wasps makes an inexpensive vibrator.:w00t: :w00t:



    The sad thing is that we can imagine that you have tried it:w00t:

    Prissymiss

    The sad thing is that we can imagine that you have tried it:w00t:


    :x

    Banned

    when you have washed your hands instead of drying them on a towel. stick them in the nearest plug socket.. :thumbsup:

    Banned

    dog_cop

    when you have washed your hands instead of drying them on a towel. stick … when you have washed your hands instead of drying them on a towel. stick them in the nearest plug socket.. :thumbsup:


    funny, i can actually see you doing that:giggle: :giggle: :giggle:

    Banned

    sassie

    funny, i can actually see you doing that:giggle: :giggle: :giggle:



    its a special one for children only :thumbsup: ..your ok then

    Circle the stain in permanent pen, so that when you remove the garment from the washing machine you can easily locate the area of the stain And check that it has gone.:thumbsup:

    Original Poster Banned

    bitseylango

    Circle the stain in permanent pen, so that when you remove the garment … Circle the stain in permanent pen, so that when you remove the garment from the washing machine you can easily locate the area of the stain And check that it has gone.:thumbsup:



    I think we have found our 'Resident Expert'.

    Banned

    if you have a real fire in your home..always make sure children are allowed to play with the fire, save on buying a playstation or psp..hours of fun :thumbsup:

    ......and finally
    Weight watchers. Avoid that devilish temptation to nibble at a chocolate bar in the cupboard or fridge by not buying the damned thing in the first place, you fat *******!
    :giggle: :giggle:

    Banned

    bitseylango

    ......and finallyWeight watchers. Avoid that devilish temptation to … ......and finallyWeight watchers. Avoid that devilish temptation to nibble at a chocolate bar in the cupboard or fridge by not buying the damned thing in the first place, you fat *******!:giggle: :giggle:



    even better.. during the winter months when its freezing outside, get and old rolo wrapper and some frozen dog poop.. re wrap the poop and bingo cheap chocolate for weight watchers.. :giggle:

    Original Poster Banned

    To save yourself time and ensure a lay-in on schooldays, put the kids to bed dressed in their uniforms with a can of pop, bag of crisps and bar of chocolate next to their beds.

    Out the door in minutes:thumbsup:

    Prissymiss

    To save yourself time and ensure a lay-in on schooldays, put the kids to … To save yourself time and ensure a lay-in on schooldays, put the kids to bed dressed in their uniforms with a can of pop, bag of crisps and bar of chocolate next to their beds.Out the door in minutes:thumbsup:


    did that once when i was at school, mum woke me in morning and went mental:w00t:
    she was more annoyed coz she had to iron my clothes again!!:oops:

    Banned

    For an easy income, sit on your a**e all day long, playing ps3 or posting on HUKD. Then every 2 weeks pop down to your local jobcentre and sign a book. Free money, paid house, council tax paid. For additional income, get a partner and squeeze out as many kids as possible, each child is worth £££££'s :thumbsup:

    Original Poster Banned

    UltimoScorpion

    For an easy income, sit on your a**e all day long, playing ps3 or posting … For an easy income, sit on your a**e all day long, playing ps3 or posting on HUKD. Then every 2 weeks pop down to your local jobcentre and sign a book. Free money, paid house, council tax paid. For additional income, get a partner and squeeze out as many kids as possible, each child is worth £££££'s :thumbsup:



    Great idea.

    Also, teenage girls can get a free flat and plenty of money for fags and booze if they get knocked up by the first available bloke. You don't even need to remember his name:thumbsup:

    Banned

    Prissymiss

    Great idea.Also, teenage girls can get a free flat and plenty of money … Great idea.Also, teenage girls can get a free flat and plenty of money for fags and booze if they get knocked up by the first available bloke. You don't even need to remember his name:thumbsup:



    I heard that these teenage girls exist, however my pursuit of them always seems to end in a trip to the local dog pound :giggle: :whistling:

    I had a tip the other week that they hang around the Argos jewellery counter:giggle:

    Original Poster Banned

    UltimoScorpion

    I heard that these teenage girls exist, however my pursuit of them always … I heard that these teenage girls exist, however my pursuit of them always seems to end in a trip to the local dog pound :giggle: :whistling: I had a tip the other week that they hang around the Argos jewellery counter:giggle:



    Try hanging around the local school, or if that sounds to risky, any local chip shop at lunchtime will do:thumbsup:

    Banned

    To save on nappies, bed protectors and pyjamas get a pack of 20 'tie top' bin liners. Stick your kids in the bin liners and pull the tie's, tied in a bow around their neck.

    Original Poster Banned

    UltimoScorpion

    To save on nappies, bed protectors and pyjamas get a pack of 20 'tie top' … To save on nappies, bed protectors and pyjamas get a pack of 20 'tie top' bin liners. Stick your kids in the bin liners and pull the tie's, tied in a bow around their neck.



    Save even more money at night, put them to sleep in the bath or gaffer taped to the toilet:thumbsup:

    Save on the cost of calling out the RAC when you break down - just plait earthworms together for an emergency towrope:thumbsup:

    Banned

    Avoid parking tickets by leaving your windscreen wipers turned to 'fast wipe' whenever you leave your car parked illegally.

    Don't invite drug addicts round for a meal on Boxing Day. They may find the offer of cold turkey embarrassing or offensive.

    An empty aluminium cigar tube filled with angry wasps makes an inexpensive vibrator. :giggle:

    Save the cost of butter, spread marg on your bread and tear holes in it, and visitors will think you having finest bread & butter.

    save money on babysitting fees:-
    put them in the bath and grease the sides!;-)

    Banned

    when your kids are thirsty and you dont have any value tescos squash...

    get the lemon fresh bleach and add water to it and serve .. lush :-D
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